Once a week every week is more then I can handle and I don't think it's right that he's out at clubs/bars while I am left at home with our new born daughter. It seems irresponsible and selfish to be at a club or bar while ur wife and child are left at home. Am I wrong for feeling this way. I don't know what our social life should be like now that we have a daughter but I can tell ya I haven't gone out at all nor do I want to because I want to spend my time with my daughter am I wrong? or am I asking too much to ask for him to not go out as much|||No! You're not wrong at all. I would be very upset too!!
Have you talked to him about it though? You should, and I really don't feel he has much business being out at bars and nightclubs when he has a wife and daughter at home.
I could see if you guys take a night out each week to be together and go out, but him going out alone is just wrong.
Talk to him and let him know how you feel it's not right
Good luck!
|||He shouldn't be going out at all. He should have left that life (without you) behind when he made a commitment to you. The head games you must be having to endure, don't ever fall for them. When you grow up and make a baby, you've got to accept the responsiblity that goes with it, and that includes not going out like your single.|||you're definitely not asking too much! he's married with a child now -- he should grow up and act more responsibly. his days of nightclubs are over.
maybe you should try getting out to more social events that you can attend as a family...like church or neighborhood gatherings...hold parties for people your age or people with kids. that way, you can meet more people your age that are more appropriate to hang out with than strippers at a nightclub. and then you can do activities with your hubby.|||No you're not wrong. As women we deserve the right to care and attention from our partners and it's time now that he gives his utmost attention to you instead of wasting time at clubs.. talk to him.. and speak to him about your inner most feelings.. tell him you're hurt and you need help with the baby.. tell him you feel neglected.. maybe he hasn't gotten a clue and probably thinks it's ok to go clubbing once a week.. tell him it's not... and let him know where you need him to help you out.. sometimes a simple 'sit and talk' session can do the trick.|||There really isn't anything wrong with him going out once a week. After a while you will need the break too. Get together with the girls for a girls night out, if you dont want to do it weekly then once in a while. Having a newborn can get stressful, it doesn't mean he doesn't wanna be with y'all. |||I feel the same way even though I havent had our child yet A man who is single and doesnt have any responsibilities can go out but If your in a relationship and have a child he needs to grow up and relize whats more important I think its ok to go to a friends house and have a few drinks while a game is on but to go to a place of singles pisses me off, goos luck to you hun i wish you the best.|||Well I could understand why you don't want your man going to an club.But you don't have no interest in going out.So what you want him to stay home and look at you and the baby..Do this guy bring home the bacon,I suggest you dust off your disco shoes and go out with your man.I wouldn't want my man going out alone.But just wanting him to stay home to be Farther Knows Best,apparently he likes to go out.So sweetie if you can't beat him,join him.|||We teach people how to treat us, so if you don't like this then you will have to make a stand and say something to him about it. Whats wrong with going to a friends place, both of you or invite friends over to your place?.|||No, you are not wrong. When I was married, my husband continued to party like a rock star, even though we had 2 small kids at home. As it turned out, my husband was an alcoholic....
Divorced 8 years now.|||hes celebrating the fact that he just had a baby girl with his boys....come on its once a week ... relax, im sure if you wanted a girls night or something lol he would do the same....if not ..... then you have a problem....|||I dont see the problem if its only once a week.
You should do the same let him watch the baby and you go out with your girlfriends once a week.|||You should go out once a week as well so your husband can have some alone time with your daughter. If your husband objects, then you have every right to be upset.|||Time to rally up the girl friend and have fun one day out of the week yourself. |||re: am I wrong?
.........google: relationship tips and find out.|||While it is admirable of you to allow him to go out frequently my question to you is ...
Where is he hanging out and who is he hanging out with? Are you sure that they're all his married buddies? I mean they just couldn't be single guys he's hanging with and women are out of the question.
Listen to me, this here hanging stuff has got to stop. Ok, there are times in life when a man needs to show his face at an occasion. In that case he takes his wife or makes the appearance and goes home. However, this every weekend thing is just off the hook. Sit him down by surprise one day and lay the new cards on the table. If he refuses, contact a marriage counselor and drag him to counseling. If he refuses to go to counseling, you have a serious problem. Good luck.|||dont put you life on hold just because you have a child. you deserve to have fun also whether its with him or the girls and it doesn't need to be once a week, it can be whenever you want. make plans and let him know its your turn and go kick up your heels and let your hair down, and its his turn to stay home and watch the little one. He needs to feel the responsibility too.
and don't feel guilty about it.
as to the question though i do not like it when my man does out with the guys and doesnt invite me i feel he has no need to be in a bar without me. so going out doesnt mean you have to go to a bar just go have some fun!! and no your not wrong for not wanting to go out
if thats who you are then dont. talk talk talk to him and see if you two can come to some type of compromise.
but you might decide you like going out with him and having a drink and talking helps unwind you both.
just dont hold all this in.... find a good time to talk to him and tell him how you really feel.
wishing you the best in tough times
:)|||once a week ...eh.. but its more then that usually right? that's just an average considering its usually more then once a week i would say he needs to grow up.You both decided it was a right time for a baby and now he needs to step up. You both work full time jobs and he still expects you to do EVERYTHING around the house as if you are at home with the baby all day. he feels his job is to work and to have fun and yours is to work and take care of baby. I'm sorry and correct me if im wrong but we are no longer in the 1930's and it shouldn't be just mommy at home taking care of the child.I do agree with others that everyone needs alone time and time to wind down and clear there minds and everyone does that in different ways BUT why cant he go to a friends house and watch the game? Why must he go clubbing every time hes out of the house?its because all of his friends are the single bachelors and that's what they do he feels hes still one of them and isnt ready to be anyone different.it sucks it really does but you HAVE to let him know how much of a strain this is on you. you two will end up falling apart in no time if hes not willing to listen and try to understand how you feel.i would say sit him down and say hey going out is ok once in a while and i understand you want time to yourself and i dont mind it on occasion but the places you attend on a weekly bases is what really bothers me. let him know your not trying to control him in anyway you want him to have his time but he needs to be there for you and baby more often.family comes first and if hes not ready hes not ready period. hes a stubborn male and if hes not ready theres no changing that he has to want it on his own theres no forcing someone to grow up. {To clear things up if anyones wondering how i know so much about the situation its because i know them personally. and i know the how much hes really out. shes being nice =))|||Well, if he is only going out once a week with the guys to blow off some steam and relax. It would probably do good for your marriage.
You being resentful isn't fair because he isn't telling you you can't go out. You said you don't want to.
You really should take a few hours to yourself. Men don't seem to have any problems doing it and us Moms' need some time to ourselves as well.
I can tell you this, once a week is nothing. Your husband will grow to resent you if he isn't allowed any free time at all.
You will both be better parents if you each get a little alone time apart and together even if it is just for short periods.|||You are over-reacting which could stress out your marriage if it continues. Once a week is normal for an adult to request alone time with friends, but he should also be willing to do the same for you. Even if your time is meeting up with some girlfriends and heading to the mall. There is nothing wrong with a guy heading to bar, per se, after all its guy time, shooting pool, downing a few beers. As long as he is not coming home totally trashed do not sweat it. Consider finding someone you can trust your baby with, and once a month or so make it a date night to go out with your hubby. This arraignment will allow you both your individual alone (buddy's night) time, your together time without the baby, and still allow both of you to enjoy time together, and alone with the baby. It is unhealthy to expect your hubby to be at home every night, just as much as it is not always healthy for you to be with the baby 24/7. After all you both have stress levels in your life that you need to let go of once in a while, and one night a week is not asking too much. He will thank you for not making a big deal out of this, but if you do make a big deal of it, there is the chance you will drive him into someone else's arms before long. If you do not want to take time for yourself, that is your choice, do not attempt to control his time just because you do not want the same thing. |||I don't think once a week is a big deal. Just because you have a child does not mean your world stops and everything is about the child, that's not healthy (for YOU or him). I understand you may want to stay home 24/7 with your daughter but be careful about alienating yourself from others because that's not a healthy social life. You still need adult stimulation and socialization. And you should FOR SURE try to get out with just your husband once a week...or twice a month. When you start to revolve your ENTIRE life around your child, you get into dangerous territory as far as neglecting yourself and your husband. Your marriage needs to come first, then the child.
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